To Deal, or Distract?

Being in my mid-twenties, I am noticing more and more how people, specifcially young people, deal with their problems. Most of what I see are young adults who, upon facing a problem, try to avoid the problem by distracting themselves or those around them as opposed to figuring out how to deal with it. When the problem faces them, they'll drink, smoke (sometimes illegal as well as legal substances), or work hard at either school or their job to take their mind off things. It seems that the standard way of dealing with problems is preocupying the mind rather than learning how to face the problem and deal with it.

In these last 3 years, I have gone through several life experiences and challenges. It seems that when you hit your mid-twenties, problems start coming at you from virtually every angle. It could be your relationships. It could be your financial situation. It could even be just trying to control over your own schedule and lifestyle. Whatever the problem is, distracting oneself will not help. Nor will bitching and complaining. Nor will worrying and freaking out. People spend more time and energy doing things to DISTRACT themselves from their problems as opposed to doing productive things that will help them DEAL with their problems.

I say this from experience. Recently, I have learned through my training as well leading a group that you can't run from your problems. You cannot distract yourself. Doing so is not only a waste of time, but eventually, the problems will catch up to you. You can never outrun your problems. You can never hide from your problems.

Many times, when faced with a problem, I used to always blame another person, or my circumstances. From a purely emotional level, it was the easy way out. However, recently, I have learned that most of, if not all of the time, the problem is not an outside force or individual. Rather, the problem is MYSELF and how I am dealing (or not dealing) with the problem. It's easy to point the finger, but I am realizing more and more how often the problem lies within ME and that it's important to face it. Is it difficult? Absolutely. But, it can be done.

Now, the real question is: How do you solve a problem that's within you? There are many ways one can do this. For me, it's a combination of my faith as well as my training. I've been taught the importance of prayer and faith since I was a child. However, I believe there is also a way of praying with your body. Some dance. Others play basketball. For me, it's my training in FMA. I say this not out of personal bias, but out of practicality. In FMA, the problem faced in front of me is so severe that I must face it whether I like it or not. A person with a weapon in their hand is a pretty scary prospect for most people, so the ability to look at the enemy in front of you, and deal with that enemy head on in a very direct and aggressive way, translates to the way you live your life. If you can face an armed individual, or several armed individuals, by yourself or with a team (which I personally prefer), then you can approach your life problems with the same focus and courage. Your training partners do more than just train with you...they train with you to improve you. They will stand by you on the physical battlefield or the spiritual battlefield. That is why I train, and that is why I teach what I teach for a living. It's the lifestyle that FMA provides that I have found to be capable of transforming people from the inside out.